Sam Nicholls
by CharieK
Summary: This story will be about Sam, written form her POV aged 15. Just my take on her life as a teenager. My first ever fic. Mentions self-harm, eating disorders and suicide. Other than Sam and Robyn and Max (not going to be included in character list), everyone is my OC for now.
1. Chapter 1

**So this will be from Sam's POV when she was 15, just my take on how I think her life would have been like. There is self-harm and suicide mentioned in this story. This is my first fic so I hope you enjoy. This chapter just introduces the main characters in the story.**

Sam Nicholls, an interesting character. A unique woman, with a unique mind. She was sporty and secretly a bit of a bookworm, she supported Holby United, not that they were a very good team, but they played for her home town. At only 15 years old she felt like a mother to her younger brother Liam, who was only 4. Sam wasn't doing well in school at all, she never told her mum about parents evening and didn't bother giving her the school reports or any letters. Sam felt like the only adult in the house most of the time. Their mother was a druggie, a prostitute, and she under appreciated both her children, especially Sam.

Gabriella Nicholls married to Adam Nicholls. She never saw the beauty in life, and had attempted to take her own on more than one occasion. She had dropped out of school at aged 14 when she fell pregnant with Sam and had given up on life ever since.

Adam Nicholls had walked out on the family a week before Liam's birth. He didn't want the responsibility of looking after 2 children; he felt it was too much for him. He visited occasionally, usually between Christmas and New Year; he hadn't found another woman since the break-up. He never really cared about Sam or Liam anyway.

Liam Nicholls, only 4 years old, he was looked after by Sam on weekends, she also dropped him off and picked him up from school on weekdays. He trusted Sam; he loved her so much because she was the only person who had ever truly loved him. Sam played with him, meaning she failed most of her homework assignments. Liam was doing well in school, because Sam also did his homework with him, she didn't want Liam to fail at school the way she was doing and she wanted him to have a future and a job that paid him a decent amount.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I'd spent the last 2 hours in a tree, I'd been suspended for school for 2 weeks, but I wasn't going to let my mum know, even if I tried she wouldn't listen or care. I've got to pick up my little brother Liam from school soon, so I'd best be going.

I always pick my little brother up from school. Mum never bothers, she doesn't know the day of the week most of the time because she's too busy, or too high or she's been knocked out because of a drug overdose. Last week she was out for nearly 2 days, but we coped with me cooking, like we always have to do. My dad sees us about once a year, around Christmas time, but he didn't bother last year. I don't have any friends at school; I'm bullied at school by this girl Amy.

I got to the school just as he was coming out of the doors; he was always really excited to see me. He waved bye to his friends and ran over to me, embracing me. He had started school only 2 months ago and he loves it, but I guess a lot of 4 year olds do.

When we got home one of mums many 'customers' was leaving, we'd gone the long way home which took nearly an hour, the other way only took 10 minutes. I made dinner again that night, just some pasta. I've been doing this since Liam was born, that's when mum really gave up on having a life, that's when she started taking drugs and stopped working, she had no money for a bit, she sells drugs now, and she sells herself. I know she doesn't think I and Liam understand what she does, and Liam doesn't, which I'm glad about. But I know everything.

We went to bed early that night, because mum thought we had stolen money from her, even though we hadn't. Liam crept into my bed at around 9pm and curled up next to me, he did this most nights.

It was the weekend tomorrow, but I and Liam still had to leave the house because mum didn't want us in the house during the day, so we have to amuse ourselves, and feed ourselves, but that's my job. Tomorrow Liam is going to his friends for lunch, so all I have to do is sneak an apple out of the house. Mum doesn't see it as her job to help us, or even feed us.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**I know I haven't updated in ages but there is so much going on in my life right now and I'm so busy with everything. I will try to update at least once more this week as it is half term but I will definitely upload another chapter by the end of next week. So this was never the original plan for the story, mainly because there never was one, but this came to me earlier today so I thought I might as well right it down.**

_Run. Don't look back. Run. She doesn't care. Run. You have to. Run. She can't follow you. Run. Never go back._

My mum had kicked me out of the house. She had even told me never to go back; Liam was already at his friend's house. I had no idea what to do, I was only 15 so I couldn't buy my own house, or get a job, I decided to camp out in my local park that night and see what happens in the future. I had no money so I didn't even know when I would get my next meal. Honestly, I was scared, terrified even.

How would Liam know what had happened? Would mum even tell him? Would he even ask questions about me? I feel like a mum to Liam, because I look after him better than mum ever did.

Mum had seen me try to take an apple out of the fruit bowl and took her belt off to hit me with it. I'd only just about managed to get away with a black eye and a cut on my left cheek. I walked around the city center for a bit today, and I got loads of weird looks, some dirty but some sympathetic.

The day dragged on and seemed endless, but after hours of walking it started to get darker. I spotted a park near to the city center and I was glad, because even though I was more used to the park that was only 5 minutes away from my house, or my old house really, this park was further away so I wouldn't see my mum or Liam.

I wanted to see Liam, of course, but I knew he'd ask me to come home, and when I told him I wasn't allowed, he would just cry, and maybe mum hadn't even told him yet. I hoped that mum would go easy on Liam, as he was only 4 years old, but he knew lots more than a child his age should do.

Walking through the gates, I could see a group of drunken homeless men; they eyed me carefully and spoke quietly to each other. As I walked past them, I realized that they were nearing towards me, I increased my pace slightly, but so did they, so I had to start running again. I ran for at least half an hour, turning corners, hiding behind trees and bushes, I realized how big this park actually was.

I couldn't find anywhere to settle down for the night that I could guarantee my safety, so I settled for a bench at the far end of the park, a relatively quiet area. I kept hearing noises in the bushes, as well as voices in the distance, or maybe I was going insane, I tried to stay awake so that I could ensure my safety, but I soon felt my eye-lids get heavier and heavier, before I finally fell asleep.

**Thanks for reading, hopefully I will be able to update more soon. Reviews are appreciated.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**So, I lied, I know this is later than I'd promised. I have no excuse; I just didn't write anything so I'm updating 2 chapters today. I find that if I take a couple of days out of writing I end up losing motivation. Thank you so much for all the reviews, they are greatly appreciated. Liam's POV is italics.**

I was woken by someone gently shaking my shoulder, I tried so hard to ignore it, but I just couldn't. I was worried that it would be one of mums' friends, or someone else who knew me, the only thing I was sure of was it wasn't a woman, but certainly not mum.

I slowly opened my eyes to see an unfamiliar face, it was a policewoman. I sat up fast, suddenly regretting it as I felt light headed afterwards, but the feeling soon went away. Within seconds, I was up and ready to bolt, but the woman's hand stopped me from doing so. I turned my head and made eye-contact with me. I could tell she didn't want to hurt me, and suddenly the urge to run subsided.

After what felt like forever, I sat down on the bench again, the woman still holding onto my hand. The woman sat down next to me, which relaxed me further.

"Hello, I'm DCI Johnson. Are you okay?" She spoke softly; I knew she was trying to speak carefully with me in case I decided to run again, but that thought had completely slipped my mind by this point. She looked young, but I knew that to be a DCI she would have to be older than she looked.

I stared at her, I couldn't tell her that I'd run away, because she'd send me back. "I…I just…well, I just got drunk last night." I quickly thought up a lie, hoping that the policewoman would believe me and let me go. What I hadn't thought of was that she was wearing a vest top, and my arms were on full show, covered in finger prints from mum as well as the cuts I made myself late at night and early in the morning.

"We should get you checked over anyway, the hospital isn't far away." DCI Johnson didn't fully believe my lie, I could tell, but she was still trying not to scare me away. She looked up and down my disgusting arms, covered in scratches that were red and still itchy, cuts that were never healed and bruises that were turning black.

I had to agree, however reluctant I was, I spent the entire walk to the hospital thinking up a story. I was constantly told that I looked older than 15, so I might not have to tell anyone that she was under 16. I knew that I couldn't change my story, so I had to say that I'd been out drinking and that I had no relatives to pick her up, which I thought wasn't technically a lie, but she decided to say that my house was close by, and that I was capable of walking home.

Me and the policewoman soon arrived outside Holby City Emergency Department, as we walked inside the policewoman lead me to reception to book me in, I looked around at her surroundings, trying to take it in as I hadn't been in a hospital before.

I was drawn from my thoughts when the receptionist asked for my name. Shit. "Errm…Katie." I now realised that she had forgotten two very important pieces of information, the first been a name, and the second was medical history. The receptionist raised an eyebrow at me, as if to ask for my full name. "Katie…Coleman." The receptionist told me to sit down, and DCI Johnson offered to sit with me, at least until triage, which I let her do as it was a kind gesture, either that or she wanted the truth.

After about 10 minutes a tall female doctor stood at reception and called Katie. I went through to a cubical with the doctor while DCI Johnson decided to stay in the hospital, but to let me go through to cubicles on her own.

I sat down on the bed, while the doctor inspected my tattered arms. "I'm Doctor Beckham. And you're Katie?" I secretly knew that the receptionist had told the doctor that she I was lying, and I figured that doctor Beckham really wanted to help me.

I only nodded in reply to the previous question. I didn't feel like talking, and I was really scared that I'd say the wrong thing. The doctor asked me some simple questions, mostly yes or no, so I didn't have to give many verbal responses. The doctor quickly cleaned the cuts on her arms, I knew she tried to be gentle, but I flinched occasionally when it really stung. I knew I had to clean my cuts after making them, but I didn't want mum knowing. Doctor Beckham then said she'd get some lotion for the scratches that I would need to take home and use twice daily until the skin healed. I simply nodded again and waited while the doctor went to get the lotion for my arms.

* * *

"LET GO OF ME!" Screamed the little boy, he was scared; it seems that in the last 24 hours he had lost everything he had, which wasn't much. There was a doctor and 2 nurses trying to calm the little boy down. He had no idea what was going on or why no-one wanted to tell him where his family had gone. Suddenly the cubicle curtain opened and the boy stopped struggling against the medical professionals that had before been trying to help him.

_I was so glad to see Sam again. I shouted her name and ran into her arms. I felt secure again, and I knew everything was going to be okay now that I had Sam back. The doctor looked at Sam weirdly, as I kept hugging my big sister._

* * *

Shit. Liam had blown my cover. Doctor Beckham asked me to sit back in my cubicle, but I refused, I sat on Liam's bed and held him tightly, still I had no idea what he was doing in hospital, I was worried about him. I kept wondering what was wrong, as he didn't appear to be in pain, a million things ran through my mind but then I saw it.

**Please review I will update later today I promise. Thank you for reading.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Liam had a massive head wound; it was still bleeding, but didn't look very recent. I looked at the doctor who again tried to convince me to move back to the cubicle I was in before, but I wanted…no, I needed to be with Liam.

"What happened?" I asked, trying not to let my emotions leak through my words, but failing.

"Who is he? And who are you?" Doctor Beckham asked with no emotion in her voice, only a hint of annoyance that I'd lied.

"Liam. Sam." I stated bluntly before reiterating my question.

Doctor Beckham kept asking questions about why I lied, if we were related, or friends. She asked how my arms had gotten so 'mutilated beyond recognition' is the term she'd used, however I think she was exaggerating. I answered all her questions before asking my question one last time.

"From what the police have reported to us, your mother hit Liam with her belt, the buckle hitting his head very hard. It is then believed your mother hung herself with that same belt. Liam range the emergence services." Doctor Beckham stated bleakly, again with no emotion, no warning that my mum had died.

It then suddenly hit me, mum was dead. I was free from her, but not from social services. They'd insist on putting me and Liam into a care home. I couldn't let that happen. Liam stayed sat on my knee, crying into my shoulder. He needed me, I had taught him how to cook, how to dial 999, how to get home from school if I couldn't pick him up, how to lie. Liam needed me.

Liam had to stay in hospital overnight; I stayed with him, of course. The next morning a social worker came up the ward we were on and took us home to collect our stuff. Within 2 hours after Liam's discharge we were stood at the door of a children's home. Of course I thought about bolting, but I couldn't because I now understood just how much Liam meant to me.

Me and Liam had never fought before, because we weren't like normal siblings, we were like mother and son should be. The door opened revealing a tall man, with blonde hair and very pale skin, he wore a red shirt buttoned nearly all the way up, except for the top button as well as dark wash jeans. He smiled at us, although his smile seemed fake. We walked through the hallway and it appeared empty.

"Hello, I'm Sean. The other children are in the garden, enjoying the sun. I didn't think you'd want to be crowded straight away. Liam you'll be sharing a room with Mike, he's 5. Samantha, you'll be getting the attic room to yourself. Is that okay?" Sean, who I presumed was in charge smiled again.

"It's Sam." I corrected him. "And yeah, that's great, thanks." I didn't bother to smile. I'd held Liam's hand the entire journey here and my palm was getting sweaty. Liam asked to go out to the garden; he was always excited to make new friends. Sean lead him out to the garden, and I followed.

Out in the garden there were a few kids playing together, all under the age of 10. There was a teenage girl sitting on a bench whilst playing on her phone. There were some boys playing with water guns and some girls dancing at the end of the garden. Sean called Mike over and introduced Liam as his new room-mate and me as Liam's big sister. I just smiled.

I decided to sit on an empty bench; I was never very good at making friends because I had so many secrets, like self-harming. My mum used to be a secret, but since she died it's a huge weight off my shoulders. I hope I fit in here, but even if I don't Liam will always be my little brother.

**Hope this was okay. Thank you to Tamjaspie who has reviewed every chapter so far. I'm going to need more reviews from other people if I'm going to keep uploading. Also if anyone has any suggestions or ideas I'd love to hear them either in the comments or through DMs. Thanks.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_One month later_

I had been in this care home for a month now, but it felt like so much longer. Liam had made some friends at school, and one at the home. I still struggled to make friends anywhere but today a new girl my age came into the children's home.

Amelia was 15, my age, and she had short brown hair. She was quiet but seemed happy enough. Her dad had abandoned her recently and her mum had died when she was little, we'd already started talking. She said she wasn't very good at making friends so I told her that I wasn't either. Amelia was polite, and didn't get into fights or arguments like I usually did. Amelia had been placed as my room-mate because I didn't seem to get along with anyone else in the home, apart from my brother, but you had to share a room with someone the same gender as yourself, so I'd been sleeping alone. Amelia liked reading, usually romance books. I loved reading, but not soppy romance books, because love doesn't really exist, it's just an act that people perform to seem like they care about someone.

My curfew was 10pm on weekdays and 11pm on weekends, my brother Liam had to go to bed at 8pm on weekdays and 9pm on weekends, because he was only 4 years old. I usually stayed with him until he went to sleep then went to talk to Amelia, watch TV, play board games or something like that until I had to go to bed. We were each allowed to use the shared laptop twice a day for an hour, but I didn't usually bother, or I used it for homework.

I wouldn't say I was bullied in the children's home, I was at school, but no-one wanted to talk to me and I was picked on by this girl who was 12 years old, so three years younger than me. She came into my room one night and took my book from my hands, technically it was Amelia's book but details aren't important right now. It was Amelia's only book that wasn't a romance book. The girl, Connie, threw the book across the room and instead of calmly going to pick it up I slapped her across the face, hard. Connie ran to tell Sean, but I followed her out of my room and grabbed her arm to stop her, but my arm couldn't grip her pyjama sleeve properly and she fell down the stairs.

Was she dead? Was I a murderer? At 15 I could be put in prison, right? What would happen to Liam?

**Sorry if any details are wrong, I have never lived in a children's home so I kind of had to make most things up, but I used to watch The Dumping Ground and Tracy Beaker/Tracy Beaker Returns, but unfortunately that is all the information I have to go on. I will try to update regularly if I can. Next chapter I am introducing a new character Robyn, based on the casualty character but as a 14 year old.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

She lived, just about. I was put in a different care home though, without Liam. According to social services, it was best that Liam didn't get moved into a different care home with me because he had made lots of friends, and it wouldn't be fair on him. Liam was kicking and screaming about the whole affair, but so was I, we had a bond, a connection, but I decided it would be okay, I'd still be able to visit him.

* * *

_2 hours later_

I was now in my new care home, It turns out that my new care home was _ages_ away from the last one and that I had to move schools, so I wouldn't see Liam again, maybe ever. There was a girl called Robyn who was a year younger than me, I was her room-mate. Robyn was sweet, but not a tom-boy.

I refused to eat dinner that night as well, it had chicken in it, and I am a vegetarian. The care staff said it was not real meat, but I didn't trust them so I didn't eat it, it was okay though because I can go a long time without eating.

At this new care home I had to be in my bedroom by 10pm on weekends, but 9:30pm weekdays. Of course, I didn't follow these rules. Robyn did, she didn't want to get into trouble because she said if you were well behaved you went on a trip during the summer holidays, I told her that they just said that to make you behave, and that you'd go anyway.

There was nothing to do though, because I didn't know how to work their TV, or computer and I had the latest 'bedtime' because I was one of the oldest children. I soon went back to my room to find Robyn fast asleep.

_The next morning_

It was Wednesday, but I wasn't meant to be starting school until Monday, so I was mainly alone all day, apart from the kids too young or old to go to school, as well as a boy called Max, who was sick.

I spent most of the day reading, it was a crime book about 2 brothers who went on mass murder missions and eventually killed each other. After I finished the book I went to watch TV, but the little kids were watching cartoons so I decided it was best to explore the garden.

The garden was spacious, with a 2 football posts at the end of the garden, a big trampoline with a net round it, a swing set and something that resembled a blanket fort, assembled with flowery blankets and cushions. I sat on one of the swings, before going back inside.

I looked up at the clock and realised it was finally time that everyone would be getting back from school, and as if on cue they all came through the front door at various speeds, some running, others meandering.

Robyn insisted that I met one of her school friends, as we would all be in the same class together. Robyn's friend, Alexia, was really nice, and she was a very creative person, her room was decorated solely by her, it looked brilliant. Alexia had a little sister; she was only 6 weeks old and was called Alice. Me and Robyn ended up having dinner at Alexia's house, it was vegetarian which I was pleased with.

* * *

_Later that night_

After me and Robyn were meant to be in bed, I managed to persuade her to come to the local park. Robyn had to show me the way, then I helped her climb over the gates as they closed at 10pm, it was almost midnight now. The (only) good thing about the care home I had been moved to was it was not very near the city centre so you could see the stars at night, but it also wasn't in the countryside so we weren't completely cut off.

Robyn was scared that the police would be sent to search for us, but I told her to stop worrying and that we would be back before everyone woke up. Robyn worried a lot, usually about getting into trouble, or about someone finding out a secret.

"Okay, what is your biggest secret?" I asked her, making direct eye contact as we sat on the wall twice our height.

"Errm…I don't know…" She hesitated before saying "I…I saw my dad…killing my mum, I was four." She looked at me, emotion brimming in her eyes, threatening to flood her eye sockets. I was speechless… By now Robyn was really crying, and I was never good at comforting people. "What about you?" Robyn finally spoke up.

I had to tell her something, after what she had just told me. My home life didn't seem like it had been so bad now that I knew this, I mean, yes I was abused and starved, but Robyn's dad obviously wasn't a good person. I could tell her how mum had died, that she had abused me, or that I self-harmed and had an eating disorder. Robyn didn't even know I had a little brother, or that I'd pushed a girl down the stairs at the old home.

Robyn always seemed so happy, not like me. I had finally decided what to tell her when we both heard a scream, only a street away. It was a female scream, like they were been hurt. Robyn said we should hide; we were in a locked park so we weren't in any danger, or not until I said "we should go and help!" I didn't even give Robyn a chance to answer before I jumped off the wall, hurting my ankle in the process, and then limping towards where we heard the screaming come from.

We saw a shadow flee from the scene and a lifeless figure lying in the middle of the silent road. I ran, Robyn slightly behind me telling me that we had to go. It was a woman; she was bleeding heavily from her abdomen where there was a large cut, possibly a knife. Robyn was anxious as she kept looking around the scene, terrified of been seen in the dimly lit area with barely any people.

After about 5 minutes Robyn's suspicions were confirmed, we heard sirens, police and ambulance. Now I knew we had to run, for 2 reasons. Firstly; we were innocent, but I'd already had a run with the police in the past month, and someone may suspect us. Secondly; we were meant to be at the children's home, not out here. We both legged it, but sirens screeched after us, their screams matching my heartbeat.

I grabbed Robyn's arm and as quick as a flick of the wing of a bat, we were behind a bush, breathing heavily and with panic in our eyes. I heard the sirens pass and let out a breath I wasn't aware that I was even holding in. "We need to get back…" I panted, still getting my breath back.

Robyn looked at me as if she was mad. "You think?!" She shouted; I was quick to shush her. We could still be heard if someone was walking past, and that was the last thing we needed. I asked if she knew where we were, because I certainly didn't.

We had quickly made it back to the care home, snuck back in and gotten safely back to our room without been spotted, which had been nearly impossible. It was now 3 in the morning, everyone in the house was woken at exactly 6:30am, so we still had time, and I could always go back to bed after breakfast as I wasn't at school.

"I killed someone." I stated, emotionlessly. I hoped Robyn was asleep, but she sat upright in bed, turning her head to look at me.

"What?" Robyn was confused at what I was talking about.

"I killed someone." I repeated. "It was an accident…"

Robyn wasn't going to rest until she knew everything about this story, and probably about me. It was going to be a long night.

**Leaving it on a cliff-hanger but I will try to update soon. In this story Max and Robyn are not related by blood, but I do have a plan for them. Connie is not based on the character in Casualty, however the name is. I sort of have a plan for this story. I need ideas on who stabbed the woman/who was stabbed. Please send ideas if you have any i.e. are they related to any characters? Will they play a big part in this story? Are they just strangers? Do they know Sam? Or do they know Robyn? I have no idea where I'm going with Sam killing someone, so ideas on that as well. Was she telling the truth?**

**If anyone has any ideas for this story then please leave them either in the comments or PM me, thanks. As always, reviews are appreciated.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**Sorry TamJaspie this should have been up way earlier. Not Sam's POV just for this chapter. Time to find out the truth about Sam's secret…**

Robyn was shocked, speechless.

Sam lay in her bed, hoping that Robyn wouldn't be able to ask any questions, at least not now, or that she'd think Sam way lying and would laugh it off as a joke, but no response came from the room-mate. Sam gave in to become a slave to sleep…

_"You are such a coward." Sam teased. Katie was constantly tormented by her older sister, Sam. "You never do any dares. This one isn't even scary." Katie was only 6, so was still fairly easy to influence, especially by Sam, who she often looked up to._

_"I'm not a coward. And it is a little bit scary." Katie knew her sister's dares weren't always safe. "I just want to go inside and wait for mummy to bring the new baby home." Katie and Sam were about to get a new little brother, Liam – Katie was excited to see her little brother, but Sam seemed untouched by the fact that there was going to be a baby in her house within the next hour and a half._

_"If you're not a coward, then you'll do it." Sam said. "Unless you're a chicken."_

_"Okay, I'll do it then." Katie gave in, her older sister would have persuaded her at some point anyway, and it may have been sooner rather than later._

_Sam sprinted up the stairs going through the middle of their block of flats, until she reached the roof with her younger sister following not far behind. Sam stood on the roof, not close to the edge as she raised an eye-brow at her younger sister._

_"How many floors high are we Sammy?" Katie looked worried, not going close to the edge yet._

_Sam sighed before stating, "15, but you're only going to the edge, so it doesn't matter, it's just like standing on the balcony on the second floor, only with no guard."_

_Katie walked towards the edge, and looked by at her elder sister, who raised her eye-brow daringly._

_Katie closed her eyes before taking a few more steps towards the edge, and quickly opening her eyes so that she knew where she was before stepping backwards towards Sam._

_"That's not the edge!" Sam exclaimed. "Go back, but do it properly."_

_"I did it properly." Katie was growing into a stubborn girl, but she was nothing like her older sister._

_Sam looked at her again. "Chicken!" Sam quickly grabbed her sister's hand and before she could refuse, she was pulled towards the edge, standing only a few feet away from the very edge of the roof, 15 stories high. Sam looked at Katie before saying "Just a few more steps, unless you're a baby."_

_Katie neared the edge so that her toes were poking off the roof slightly, before looking at Sam questioningly, who had moved back._

_"Fine come back then." Sam said, accepting the fact that Katie had completed the dare properly._

_"You shouldn't force people into doing things that they don't want to do. It's not nice Sammy." Katie was in a mood, as she walked back over to Sam, who smiled cheekily. "I don't like you, and I never want to play with you ever again!"_

_Katie forgot her surroundings, and stepped backwards._

_"Come back Katie!" Sam warned, as her sister was nearing the edge again, however this time she was unaware that she was taking small paces towards the edge of the roof._

_"No. I don't want to!" Katie stressed, as she kept moving closer to the edge with every footstep._

_"You'll fall off!" Sam began to shout now, but not too loud as she wanted to keep her younger sister calm._

_"I don't believe you Sammy!" Katie verbalised._

_Before she fell…_

Sam woke up screaming. Just as a care home worker came into her room.

"Sam, stay calm for me. What happened?" Alice worked nights at the care home, and she had never had to deal with Sam before, although she had seen her and exchanged brief greetings the previous night.

Sam kicked and screamed as Alice tried to console her, but to no avail. Sam was confused and vulnerable, but couldn't explain why as she couldn't see clearly through her glazed, baby blue eyes. Soon enough, the head care worker was called in, as he to tried to relax the poor afraid teenage girl.

There was now a small crowd of teenagers and children, some confused, some annoyed others worried or curious had gathered at the door to Robyn and Sam's bedroom. Robyn was sat on her bed, watching the scene quickly unfold in front of her eyes.

Sam's screams were replaced, almost suddenly as her energy levels declined, before she was left sobbing in Alice's small, feminine arms. "She's dead…because…of…m…me." Sam was emotionally drained after her outburst.

The head worker at the home, Adam, had guided everyone, including Robyn out of the room. "Go back to bed, all of you." He exclaimed in a whisper tone so that Sam wouldn't hear. Everyone went back into their rooms, but as most of them had at least one other person in their rooms they talked about theories on what Sam had been through.

After about an hour, Sam had finally calmed down, she was finally beginning to relax and Alice was hoping that she would soon fall asleep. "Sam?" Alice asked gently, hoping that if Sam was awake, she'd be nearly asleep.

"Yeah?" Sam replied, still wide awake, her mind buzzing with thoughts.

"Are you tired?" Alice was only experiencing Sam's character for the first time, and had so far found it surprisingly easy, especially under the circumstances.

"No, I can't stop thinking about…everything." Sam had tried to go to sleep for the last hour, but to no avail. She had never slept easily at home because her mum would be drunk playing loud music, so she was used to not sleeping much. "I just…my life has changed so much recently, and it's really hard to cope with. I was promised me and Liam wouldn't be separated, but now he lives 2 hours away from me and I may not see him for ages." Sam was really worried about Liam, even though she knew he had friends to play with both at his children's home and at his school.

"Your brother will be okay." Comforted Alice. "I know it's been really hard for you. I remember losing my mum when I was 16, and it was really hard because I was just leaving high school and trying to get a job as well as getting into a college. I decided to take a year out of education and just focus on myself. As I high school student I realise you can't do that, but I could call your new school and ask if you could take some time before starting."

"Yes please. I think I just need to be alone." Sam replied, still not tired, but hoping Alice would get the idea and leave.

Alice smiled. "Okay, Robyn's volunteered to sleep with Lisa tonight so that you can be left alone for tonight. If you need me then please call or come and find me."

"Thank you, for everything. I'll come and find you if I need to." Sam pretended she was tired, and lay down under her duvet.

"Night Sam." Alice said, before leaving the room and closing the door behind her.

Sam spent the rest of the night tossing and turning, unable to sleep but not wanting to bother Alice or anyone else. She knew she had drawn attention to herself and that she'd have to face everyone in the morning, which she knew would not be an easy task to accomplish, and that she would have to explain herself sooner or later. Everyone at her new school would know what had happened and now Sam was even more anxious about making new friends.

Sam crept downstairs into the kitchen and did something she hadn't done in over a year.

She cut…

**Hopefully this chapter was okay, ideas were generated between me and TamJaspie and thank you to Gillian Kearny Fan for giving her idea saying Sam wasn't lying about killing someone, but it was an accident. Thanks for reading, please leave a review.**


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